Past Dive Reports    
 

 

April 01, 2007      Some April Foolery on the RMS Oregon

17 brave souls headed out for opening season on the Lockness to the Wreck of the RMS Oregon. We were rewarded for our troubles with calm seas and mild topside weather. On the bottom we found the temp 40 degrees top to bottom and about 20' of visibility. About a dozen lobster and 5 dozen scallops came up. A few nice artifacts came up as well, a brass door vent and some ornamental buttons. Most divers only did one dive and kept the BT short due to the cold. We did have a couple CCR divers do longer dives. I received the April Fool award for doing a 30 min dive even though I had two tears in my drysuit. I am sure I'll thaw out one day. Of course the usual jokes and jabs that make the day great with good people. Can't wait for the USS San Diego next week, I may even fix my suit.

 


Cheers - Capt. John Bricker

 

April 07, 2007 

The Lockness went to the San Diego this Saturday 4/7/07.  The water was warmer than the air, water temp was 41 degrees air temp was 33 degrees...that's just wrong! The vis was 25 ft. It seems that the top structure is starting to collapse downward,  remember it's upside down. The middle of the hull is about 10 ft. lower then last year. It's dropping and will close many openings.  We were thinking maybe it's the weight of the engines upside down all these years taking its toll? One of the divers come across a Shoe and we were wondering if it belonged to the person known as The Shoe??  When one of the guys told my he is known as The Pants on another dive boat (Garloo) because he dove last year with the top of his wetsuit on and wore his pants on the bottom!!  Could it be possible the Shoe and the Pants are the same person?? Rumor has it he might be known as the Tie on the boat  Jeannie 2 ? Anybody with any information about a Hat or Vest or Sweater wearing diver, please have a camera near by.

 

 

April 21, 2007         

 

Lockness sailed to the wreck known as the G & D on Saturday 4/21/07.  The water temp was 43 degrees, the vis was 3 feet, not the best to say the least. Scallops and Lobsters came up anyway, in spite of the conditions. We also found out  there was a bout of "Oregon Ass" going around.  For those of you that don't know what that is, it is like a intestinal virus that will make you miss the dive of the G & D. The only known cure is to dive on the Oregon!  Yes that's right, believe  it or not, its the only cure? It's one of the 8 Wonders of the World!! (That's Dive World). This condition only effects mates, never any passengers.  Isn't that the strangest thing you ever heard?! I only hope this Saturday's trip to the Oregon,  my poor sick mate can muster the strength to make the trip and receive the cure??

 

 

 

Seriously, a weird thing happened on the trip home.  We were about 4 miles from Jones inlet on a clear day, Capt. Kevin was running the boat and I looked to the shore line and I said "Where the Hell are we???"  I looked at the GPS to make sure it said "Jetty" and it did, but the coast line we were looking at I never saw before.  Everyone in the wheel house were seasoned boaters with hundreds of trips from Jones inlet and none of us saw anything that looked remotely familiar!! I t looked low lying buildings or cliffs along the whole coastline.  At 3 miles we couldn't see the Pencil or the Jones beach theater.  It was like a Twilight Zone episode.  We left Freeport April 21, 2007 and we came back April 21, 2027.   But just before we were about to cry and call "Mommy!!", we realized it was a Mirage. The temp on land was high 70's, water temp low 40's.  I guess that had a lot to do with it.  I spoke to other local captains in the area and a few have experienced the same thing.  Besides my crew, it was the strangest thing I've seen in a while. (sober)!!         

                                      

The "Legend"

 

May 05, 2007

  

Lockness went to the Oregon Sat 5/5. We had flat seas and 20+ ft. vis.  Lobsters and Scallops and some artifacts come up. We are pleased to announce that the bout of Oregon Ass has been cured!!  It's miraculous but once you touch the Oregon its a cure, the pain goes away,the cramps are gone and its a great day for the Irish!!  So if your not feeling well, or blind, deaf, or have Leprosy, we have discovered the cure (sort of like the Fountain of Lourdes in France). Let's just keep it to ourselves, no need for the world to know.

 

So I finally did my first dive of the season and now it all comes back to me as to why I didn't miss it all winter.  Just suiting up is a project in itself.  So I decided to impress some of the guys by putting my mask on first then my hood. It takes a while to master that skill.  I also had my $1000 computer serviced in some foreign  country. I'll get to that in a minute.  So I take the big splash into the 43 degree water, start my way down, the squeeze is so bad I thought my eyes were going to pop out of their sockets.  As I'm descending, its all coming back to me as to why I hate this sport!!! When I finally clear my sinuses, I can feel my eyes touching my mask (that's got to leave a mark)!!  The only thing more painful then that, was the tip of my middle finger, where the hole in my glove was the size of a quarter.  It wasn't the fact that the tip of my finger was about to fall off, I almost got use to  that, but when the Bergalls started to feed off the tip of my finger then I knew Golf is in my future!!! Bergalls by the way, are little fish that  thought they were Piranha that day!!  Did I mention that I lost the head of my Startec light?  So as the fish are Eating me Alive now, all I can think about is how much the light is costing me!!!  Thank god its finally time to surface.

 

Oh now my $1000 dollar computer is in  a language that doesn't look like anything I ever learned in PS 130 in Queens NY.  Apparently meters are a little different then feet.  When fish are eating you alive, it's hard to remember how many feet are in a meter!!  So now I am at my 20 ft stop.  I can see I almost made it.  Time to switch to 100%  O2. Naturally my regulator is free flowing.  But the good news is, I killed every fish that was eating my finger!!  In case you don't know how to breath out of a free flowing regulator...keep turning the valve on when you have to take a breath and off when you're done.  It gets easier after about 15 to 20 minutes!!  I can't wait for my second dive next week!!

 

The Legend!!

 

 

May 26, 2007

 

Lockness ran to the Ayuruoca, AKA the Oil Wreck this past Saturday.  You couldn't have asked for better topside conditions. While the bottom was a little cold @41 Degrees, the vis was a acceptable 10-15' depending on who you asked. We were tied in on the stern section. On my dive I swam to the gun tub and Aux. helm station on the very stern. While the forward wheel on the double helm was taken years ago the aft one is still there and is a good 7' in diameter. Others spent their time digging and a few cold cream jars, a wine bottle, and a fantastic platter with the ships line was recovered. As always a good time with good people.

For those that never have dived the Oil Wreck, she is a fantastic dive. A 460 odd foot freighter sunk after collision in 1945. She now lies in 2 pieces upright and intact in 175' in NJ mud hole. All the masts are intact and standing to the crosstrees. Since she was carrying war supplies, she has several trucks lashed to the decks. The deck gun and aft helm are a must see. The bridge, on the bow section, can be reached in about 90'. The deck are at 145'. The only drawback is that the mud hole wrecks are heavily fished so entanglement is concern.

 

Capt. John Bricker

 

 

June 23, 2007

 

One of the best things about owning a dive boat and being a diver is the ever present search for a new wreck, something no one has ever dove, or even knows about.  It's the stuff we dream of. This Sat. our dreams came true, after years of begging, pleading, and buying countless beers.  One of the local fisherman gave me a set of #s for a wreck. Within a week we set up a trip to dive the virgin wreck and we had the who's who of the dive world on the boat ( I don't mean me!). We had the crew Pat Rooney, Jeff ( I hate everybody ) Pagano, Kevin Dorman, Gus Bricker ( AKA Russ Ricker), and we would have had John Bricker but he came down with a case of New wreck ass so we sent him home. The other legends besides myself were Richie Kohler, Frank Pellegrino, Evan Kovics, M3 (Marty Schutzbank), and M4 (Mike Schwaner), were there and also Jeff (I broke the window ) Gershen. Now the bad news is the wreck is 60 miles away, in 200 feet of water,  the #s he gave me are Loran #s which can be a little difficult. The wreck is low lying which makes it harder to find.  Oh did I mention the 30 knot winds??!! The wind dropped to 15+ so we left at 3 AM for the 6 hr. cruise, going slow to conserve fuel. We got there around 9 AM and the waves are huge.  I don't see anything on the ocean floor, my heart rate is increasing with every minute, I don't see anything. So now I'm saying to myself,  we just went 60 miles for nothing, what a loser you are.  You knew you should have waited for a better day! Now I can feel the sweat coming down my forehead and the voices in my head is calling me names like Jackass, Asshole, Loser and a few more I would rather not mention!! After more then a hour I keep seeing this little raise in the Ocean floor that comes up around 4 to 5 Ft. It was hard to tell because the waves were a lot bigger then that. Finally  we drop the line on some little speck in the middle of the Ocean, the voices are saying you just wasted  a lot of time and money Jackass!  Jeff and Pat jump in to tie into probably a old refrigerator or shopping cart ( the voices again ).  When the bottle came up I can't believe  we are on something. The voices are now saying, you the man, words like great, legend, and  I think I was taller at that moment. As it turns out we discovered a very large sailing vessel that has never been touched since the early 1800's.  Pretty cool!  We think it was a four masted ship over 300 feet long. A Little while later a lift bag comes up with 2  portholes very old and very cool.  Evan said they were just sitting in debri, loose, just waiting for a diver to come by.  We were tied into the anchor wench  on the bow.  On the stern is a bronze helm station, a fare amount  of coal too. Also there were 2 anchors on the bow. The vis was 30+  There were lots of lobsters and even some Cod fish which you don't see many of anymore. The temp. was around 48.  We will be going back there soon to see if we can find out more about her on a lot calmer day.  Being the first person to touch the wreck you are allowed to name it.  First it was Jackass then PJ Jackass, then FW (Filthy whore) so that's it we...found the Filthy Whore. So next time your with a filthy whore just remember she wasn't until we found her!!! 

 

The Legend??

 

 

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2006 Dive Season Reports:

May 6, 2006

For the purpose of this story, and not to name names,  I will refer to this person as the *Shoe*. After a long winter we finally had our first dive trip on Sat. to the Diego.  The weather and the seas were great for this time of year. As everybody was gearing up to jump into the 44 degree water, I noticed one guy, older then me, with a wet suit on (The Shoe). So now I am wondering, is this guy a *Legend* like me, or is he a jackass? With 19 people on the boat he then ask if anyone had a left booty.  So I tell him we're all dry suit divers and we don't use bootys. Than he says "Oh that's OK"  and proceeds to put on his left Sneaker.  Now I am so pissed off that I didn't bring my video camera I could scream! He jumps in with spear gun in hand and sneaker on foot and does his dive, so I figure 44 degree water he will be back in ten minuets with a bad limp! A half hour later he comes back dumps his gear and stays in his wetsuit and sneaker for the next 3 hours.   So I figure he is done for the day but to my surprise he does a second dive.  When the (Shoe) comes back on the boat it finally happens, I guess, he can't feel his left foot and falls on his back, (good thing he still had his tank on to break his fall!)  But the Shoe was fine and he told me has not eaten beef in two days so he is a little weak!!!!??? So I figure now is a good time for a beer. Did I mention we had a film crew from NYU shooting a document about about diving, two girls and one guy. The second girl, for all intent purposes we will call her the(Sleeper) as for the rest of this story she was in charge of filming and recording. I knew it was not  a good sign when she took 2 sea sick pills at the dock! So 3 hrs. later she wakes up so she can puke. Again I don't have my camera.  Damn! So 3 hrs. later we are telling tales of how great we are in the wheelhouse when in the middle of thrilling  my story of running out of air and cheating death she falls asleep with the microphone in her hand.  Are you shittin' me?  Its one of my best stories!!!! Now she is almost dead in my eyes! After her 3 rd. nap she gets a phone call from her mother who asked her were she is.  She tells her mother she is in the middle of the North Atlantic ocean with a boat full of *middle aged men *(I assume she was looking at Lou Gardino) So this is boat diving at its best!   I will miss the Sleeper and the Shoe, but one thing I learned is always have your camera and beer on the boat!  

         

Capt. John ( The Legend)

 

 

July 29, 2006 

What seemed like just another dive turned into a little more than that. For the purpose of this story, we will refer to diver # 1 as an excellent diver, we will refer diver # 2 as death with fins! 

On July 29th we went to the Coimbra, 57 miles southeast of Jones inlet and a depth of 190 ft. We left the dock at 4:30 am and arrived at the wreck about 8:30 am.  At this time everybody started suiting up to start there dive. Everybody is also doing Tri mix (so one would think they knew what the fuck they're doing)! So when diver #1 & #2 go in, everything seems fine except for a bad surface current.  About 35 min. later they pop up about 75 ft. behind the boat, I know this can't be good. They get on the tag line behind the boat and my mates Capt. Kevin Dorman, Pat Rooney, Jeff Panago and Capt. John Bricker start to pull them to the boat, which was no easy task. Diver #2 takes off his mask and takes out his regulator (that's two things you never do)! When we get them to the boat, diver #1 tells us they did 30 min. on the bottom an diver # 2 ran out of gas (I
can't believe anybody tri mix certified could be that stupid)! So diver # 1 does an emergency accent ties his penetration line to the wreck and starts to go up with diver # 2 sharing his gas.

Did I forget to mention that they both left there deco bottles at the anchor line, something I don't do on a deep dive for that very reason? Get used to swimming with 4 tanks on you. Diver # 1 is sharing his gas and holding on to # 2 and ascending so he can't shut off his heater in his suit which is starting to burn his chest. They come up way too fast and when they hit 60 ft. the current pops them to the surface. By the time we get them to the boat they're in big trouble. Diver # 1 was in so much pain and holding his chest I thought he was having a heart attack. My crew put both men on O2 immediately and put  # 2 back in the water on 100% O2 at 15 ft.. for over 60 Min. with Capt. Kevin with him to make sure he was OK.Meanwhile, the minute I saw how much pain # 1 was in, I immediately called the Coast Guard and requested a helicopter rescue. After telling them I couldn't leave because I had divers in the water, they said a Helo was in route but it would take at least 1 hr. So we waited for the Helo.  The pain in # 1's chest subsided a bit but he said he felt numb (That can't be good)!  So 5 min. before the Helo got there we pulled diver # 2 out of the water and got him ready for a basket ride (Oboy)! We unhooked from our mooring and started steering into the wind 300 degrees as per pilot instructions. We were doing about 6 knots when the helo was 8 feet above my antenna's (Holy Shit). Meanwhile my mates are pulling a line from the helo and pulling the basket on to the back of the boat.  When it gets there they put diver # 2 in, thumbs up and away he goes. They do the same thing for diver # 1.  It was like clockwork.  In fact,  the pilot praised the work of the crew.   Within 5 min. they were gone. There's not too many boats around that have a crew like ours. They are second to none. Meanwhile, all the passenger's are taking pictures and video.   I have great video which I will share at a meeting after the season.  So when all is said and done,  we will learn from this. I hope diver# 1 learns not to dive with # 2. Now it's finally over we start to head home.  I figure I need a beer and I can almost taste it.  Then the Coast Guard tells me I have to take a drug and alcohol test when I get back to port (are you shittin' me)?! As it turns out both divers are OK they went to the chamber and will be fine.  

 

Capt. John  (The Legend! )

 

 

August 6, 2006

Just when I thought it couldn't get any worse it did!  For the purpose of this story we will refer to him as The Worst Diver in North America! We had a dive to the Diego.  We were out the day before and the ocean was like a lake. There was no forecast for any wind so I expected the same for this day. We left the inlet at 6 am, a little choppy.  I figured it would lay down, but it didn't.  By the time we got to the Diego it was Evil and out of the East. As we all know nothing good comes out of the East! As we tie into the wreck, I look at my mates and know there going to have a real busy day (18 divers) to say the least.  Now I'm saying to myself, we should have went to the Iberia, but that was that. The first diver in, we have to pull him back to the boat with the tag  line. Too rough, current, the planets weren't aligned right or something like that.  Now I know its going to be a long day.  Everybody sick, tanks are falling, its a cluster Fuck and were in the middle of it!  One of the passengers tells me if we pull the boat up and take some scope out of the line it will better. I tell him when the divers are up,  I will pull the boat forward and take up some of the slack.  Meanwhile, one of the passengers ( we will call him Elvis) tell's me his buddy has not come up yet ( OBOY). So I look at the roster and see he jumped in at 9:15.  I look at my watch it's 10:15.  I say to Elvis,  please tell me he's got double 120 tanks?!  Elvis tells me he's got a -Red- 80 tank (not sure what the Red meant?)  Now, very calmly, I go to the wheelhouse and start looking down current in 4-5 Ft. seas looking for any sign of anything!  I am thinking, here we go again, Coast Guard Helicopter, Drug test, Etc.. like last week.  All of a sudden my ex # 2 mate yells that the mooring line is undone.  The boat does a 360 degree turn and now we're Ass backwards into 5 ft. waves smashing into  the stern of the boat ( Holly Shit).  Did I mention I have 5 divers still under water and  one diver missing? Oh wait, it gets better!  I ask my ex 2nd mate ( for the purpose of this story we will call him Rus Ricker) did the line snap?? Now here comes the good part... he says to me in a very low voice that the same passenger and him tried to pull the boat forward so they untied IT and the line pulled out of their hands.  Now just so you understand,  wind 20 kts.  4-5 Ft. seas very close and a Forty thousand pound boat that the PASSENGER and ( Rus Ricker) are trying to pull foward makes sense to me?????  Finally the divers come up. We throw out a ball on the mooring and I start looking for the missing diver or should I say ( friend of Elvis).   I take a compass heading and start to the West.  I give myself a half hour before I'm calling the Coast Guard.  We go a mile and a half and I find ( friend of Elvis) just floating around not a care in the world, 1 1/2 miles away...Holy Shit!  I said to him, do you no how lucky he was, and he said he knew I would find him (no sausage bag).  That's when I realized he was the worst diver in North America!  Now we get the ball on and go to the wreck called the Dry Dock, 50 Ft. not too nasty of a ocean.  I figure they can't hurt themselves on this one. When friend of Elvis comes up again, he is 30 ft. behind the boat.  You just can't make this Shit up!  As for my mate ( Rus Ricker), we are sending him to the Howard Klein School of Mating!!  So what could be better then owning a dive boat!!!   

                         

Capt. John  ( The Legend)!! 

PS. He makes The Shoe look like Jacques Costeau!! 

 

 

August 2006

 

The First (and last) Lockness Night Dive Report

Here it was a beautiful Thursday night, in late August. The guys were all set with their gear on The Lockness for the first (and last) night dive. My future ex-husband informs me that he's leaving the shop (which I shall be the sole owner of shortly) and heading to John's (who is DEAD in my eyes) at 5pm for the night dive. OH BOY, the NIGHT DIVE oooooooooooooohhhh! So off they go. Now mind you, I'm home with my two boys....AND my mother- in-law (soon to be dead next to Gorman and Jamie). Now I'm sitting at home listening to my mother-in-law ask Nick questions which Nick answers, but she can't hear! Then Nick asks her questions, and all she says is "what?" "huh?" or "oh my butt hurts”, “oh my knees hurt" Oh yeah... I'm having a great time now! I go up to bed and read my book. Now I see it's about 10pm and I figure Jamie should be coming home within the hour. That would have made his dive trip just about 6 hours long. Makes sense, no? NOOOOOOOOOOO! Of course not! Why should ANYTHING make sense if it includes Capt. “Dead in my eyes” Gorman ! ! ! The time approaches 11:30pm, and figure a call coming soon. Nick asks when daddy will be home and Jamie asks “isn’t it sort of late for daddy to be out still?” I'm like, yes, uh huh, yup. Then Nick asks if dad could've been eaten by a shark. I almost said YES, but I knew that would make him cry, and I'm not in the mood for any whining crying kids at this point. I doze off and young Jamie wakes me..... “MOM! MOM! It's like 1:00 am and dad's still not home. Aren't you worried???” Worried??? Nah... why should I be worried. He's with the great captain who has almost cut the leg off one diver, damn near lost two divers to the bends, had another diver surface like a mile and a half away from his boat, AND can't spell to save his life. Worried... NO. Maybe this was an OVERNIGHT DIVE??? So I start calling Jamie's cell phone...."The caller you are trying to reach is not available” …or has left for a night dive on The Lockness. “Please leave a message". I try calling about 5 times, but no answer. At this point, I don't want to leave a message because if I do, the screaming will burst Jamie's ear drums when he hears it. It's now almost 2 a.m., and the steam is spewing from my ears. My eyes are bugging out, and the kids are pacing my bedroom. I’m now thinking...should I call Pat?? Oh GEEZ NO! She's probably way more pissed than me, and even I'd be scared! If anything happened, I'm sure she'd call me to let me know, right? So I call Jamie's cell one more time. HE ANSWERS! I don't really remember what I said but I think I used expletives more than a few times! Now he is home, and more angry spewing comes out of my mouth. I take a breath and he says "Susan, I'm shot, tired and I want to go to bed. Can we finish this in the morning?" OH BOY...little did he know I wasn't going to let him LIVE until the morning! John would truly see DEAD people that morning! So, of course, first thing in the morning, I give him the speech about how he has no clue how worried I get when there is no phone call to let me know he's up and out of the water.... yada- yada. He tells me that there is no cell service until you get inside the inlet and at that point it's useless to call because he'll be home shortly. OH REALLY? DUH ! ! ! So I ask him, “Doesn't John have a satellite phone?” He says “Yes, but did you want me calling at 1am and waking up the whole house?” AAAAAAAAARRRRRGGGGG! The whole house WAS up you turd-4-brains! Friday was not a pretty day. Mr. “DunWell” was a bit cranking and beyond tired. We're lucky if he stays up until 9pm most nights! So, as I end this story, let it be known that if Jamie wants to make any more dives on The Lockness, he must bring his mother on the trip with him so I'm assured of a phone call when he's done! What happens on the Lockness may stay on the Lockness, but what happens at the Arkins NEVER stays at the Arkins'!